One Step at a Time

Where is this road that I am on leading me to?

It's one of the hardest things in the world for me to 'trust.' At times, I am the total opposite and trust way to much and in the long run become a door mat. But it seems more recent, I need to trust the one person in my life that can actually help me. My selfishness has turned me away from the Lord.

For example, school. I have had a rocky semester. Not because I wanted to, just because that's how it evened out. School will never come easy for me and I'm ok with that. But I desire so bad, to pass a class with a grade that is on the boarder of failing. It's my lack of trust in the Lord that he will bring me through the class, and I have come to the conclusion that I may NOT pass a class. As hard as that is to swollow, it's a lesson, a HARD lesson at that, but a lesson. I desire so much to be that academic student, that student that can study and ace the test. Me on the other hand have never been that way.

Although, as I look back at my life, the entire soon to be 20 years of it. I see things that I wish I could go back and change. One being, not finishing high school. High school despite how much it sucks is a place where you learn so much, maybe not academic wise, but for sure, social wise. I missed out on that. I wish that I would have gone back to Fairhope High School and finished. Not have taken the easy road out. Not saying that home-school is bad and at that time in my life, I needed to be home-schooled, but I was healthy at one point and I think that I could have gone back and finished it out. But, there's no reason to look back at things that can't be changed.

I'm just learning the hard way, once again. I keep telling myself that I am on this road for a reson. I was placed in this situation at this time for a reson greater than myself. As hard as that is for someone to admit and move forward, I am trying my hardest. So I keep telling myself that I have to take One Step at a Time. There's no reason to rush to finsish collage, there is no reason to wish things that have not yet entered my life, because the Lord has plans for me and I need to be patient and wait, because they will come.

On a cooler note, I registered for Spring 2009 classes ( Lord willing that I pass the classes that I am currently in).

Here is what I am going to be taking.
- Geography with a Lab
- Survey of Communication Theory
- Computer Application
- Introduction to Writting and Reporting for the Media

I'm looking forward to taking those classes.

Well, I'm going to go and study....this week is a stresser. I have so much due...lets see. An American Lit paper due tomorrow, a 6 page research paper due in Advertising due Thursday (on Public Service Announcements) and an American Lit test on Thursday!!! GO ME!

Enjoy this beautiful weather, Fall has finally arrived!! YEAH!

Mid-Term!

Good Lord!! Where has time gone?

Last week was mid-terms and it's hard to believe that half the semester is already over. Mid-term is the point in the semester when you find your current grade and you then freak out beyond beliefe, praying to God that he gives you the passing grade.

I'm pretty close to that line. Sad to say, but yes! I have never been a good student, I love to learn, it just has never come easy for me. That is one of my many downfalls. But, like everyone says, I have other things that work in my favore.

Beside school, I have been busy decorating the apartment for fall. I bought some pumkins and today I am going to make an arragement on our table....I'm looking forward to see what it turns out like. I have a secented Apple candle burning and it just makes the entire place smell like fall!!! I love it....although I wish that it would be a little cooler, that weather will come on its own time, no need to rush it.

Well I just thought that I would drop a post, to tell you guys that I am alive and that I may be losing weight and losing hair because stress induces alot of not so good things in my life. Something that I have to learn to manage, that can be a work in progress!!

Enjoy the week:)

Fall has Arrived!

Gosh, I can't tell you at how much I love fall!! Aww, just the thought of being able to open your windows and let the crisp air run throughout your house ( or in my case, apartment ) is the best feeling in the world. I think I love this time of year so much is because it was on the prettiest times of year in Wisconsin growing up. Unless you have lived in the north and visited during the changing of the leaves, you have no clue. Looking back at it,I see how God just used a paint brush and had a day with a it. But there is also a downside to it as well, and that is, the leaves fall and then the snow arrives. Of course the first snow fall is magical and wonderful, but that is the downward spiral until April.

My two favorite months are, October and November (birthday month)! We have been really lucky this year in the south with the weather. I opened the windows last week and at night I woke up cold, not wanting to get out of bed and go to class....if that's hard to believe!

But, I will tell you, I can't believe that this year has gone by so quick. I was looking at my calender today in amazement that it's already October and then I saw that we only have 10 more weeks left until 2009!!! How crazy is that, I mean it's almost wrong. I have come to the conclusion that as you get older the time goes quicker. I mean, it really does feel like just yesterday that I was starting college, and here today in December I will be a junior. And on top of that I am going to be 20, on November 6!!!! 20! Two decades, just the sound of that makes me sick. But hey, like most say the 20's are the best times of your life. I'm hoping so because the teenage years sucked.

Classes are going well for me, although I have come to find out that college takes alot more time than you think. Of course I knew that I was going to be studying and writting papers, ect, but what I didnt realize is that on top of that you have to make a social life (of which I have lacked in), you have to find a job (something I don't have to do but I want to) and then find time to sleep. Believe me I have come to love a good afternoon cat nap. It just seems that the more you pile on your day the faster the day goes and then you have to do it all over again. That's exhausting. I'm guessing that is what it feels like to me a mom, the same routine over and over every single day.

Just wanted to keep everyone up to date, even though there is no fun news in my life. I mean no fun news. No boy drama, no friend drama, school drama was last week and life for me right know is going well. Of course me and doubtfulness I am guessing that something is coming my way, but I am turing that one over to the Lord to handle. I can't add another thing to my plate!!

Enjoy the fresh fall air! I'm looking forward to going out and craving a pumkin and making my center piece for my kitchen table!!